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Call of Duty: Ghosts is a 2013 first person shooter video game developed by Infinity Ward (with some assistance from Neversoft and Raven Software) and published by Activision.

I'm just going to be upfront about this. I really didn't want to have to revisit this game. It's absolute garbage. But after doing a Strawpoll and including this as an option, it won out. Time for me to endure a similar amount of pain I went through having to review The Secret Life of Pets.

I didn't want to start with the plot, because to many it's come to be expected that Call of Duty has really shitty plots. But this was after Black Ops 2 came out. There's no excuse for this. Then again, Infinity Ward is the 3rd best Call of Duty developer. That was a joke, by the way.

The plot revolves around a guerrilla stealth faction that assists in a war against South America. Yeah. South America. Don't laugh at it, guys, they were running out of nationalities for the player to kill without hesitation or thought like real soldiers do!

You play as Logan Walker, an emotionless and voiceless killing machine who aids his father, brother, and 2 other people the game doesn't actually give twelve shits about to stop this general in the Federation named Rorke, who's going after all of the Ghosts. The plot isn't very unique and is entirely stupid, with the main villain being a dollar store version of Darth Vader. And just like how Darth Vader kills Obi-Wan, Rorke kills Elias (Logan's father who sounds an awful lot like Peter Griffin in one mission) in an attempt to bring the plot more life, meaning, or reason for existing. Needless to say, it failed. The characters are one dimensional and have no other character traits other then being buff, tough, and ready to mow down faceless human beings. The main MacGuffin of the film revolves around the two Norse gods nobody really cared about until the Thor movies, Odin and Loki, which are basically satellite weapons that fire metal rods that destroy the landscape due to the kinetic energy it produces. This is actually rather badass, but in the mission where you actually control this behemoth that creates massive craters in the earth, it turns into a basic vehicle section and has zero meaning. Plus, the ending is one of the worst video game endings in the entire world, and since it'll officially be 5 years since the release of the game that we can hope for any closure on the series, I think it's safe to say that it is the worst video game ending of all time.

But whatever. Nobody really plays Call of Duty for the plot, so I suppose I can excuse this shitty plot, because people are more focused on the gameplay. And to those people I say this: Fuck you and just replay Modern Warfare if that's your defense for this shit.

The gameplay is a carbon copy of older Call of Duty games, which really sucks ass because there was clearly no innovation put into this. The vehicle sections are difficult and some of the worst things ever, while normal gameplay features nothing more than mowing down opposition with guns that have no distinctive feature to separate them from other guns. Also, for a game revolving around a stealth guerrilla group, there is a hilariously low amount of actual stealth missions. And by the end of every stealth level, you still have to mow down a horde of enemies and maybe have a shitty turret or vehicle section at the end.

And don't get me started on the shitty space physics. Or water physics. Or the developers thinking that having fish swim away when you get too close is an original idea when Super Mario 64 did it over 15 years prior.

Then there's the multiplayer, which is also rather disappointing when it comes from Call of Duty. Yeah, they added dynamics to maps. Right after Battlefield did it. And a total of 2 maps are dynamic. There's also 2 factions to play as, which is a disappointment considering the variety of factions to maps that previous installments had. Again, I feel like I should bring up the guns, because they all are uninspired and unoriginal. The perks aren't bad, but they aren't very good either. All of the killstreaks are absolute horseshit, except for Guard Dog, which is basically the only one you'd ever need. The maps are bland and have nothing to their name. The only good map is Showtime, and that's because they remade Shipment, the best Call of Duty map there is.

And then there's the Extinction mode, which is honestly rather good, considering it isn't Infinity Ward that makes the Zombie modes. There's a lot of different varieties of aliens, different gameplay other than unlocking the whole level and mowing down zombies/aliens, and a decent plot that has some substance to it. My only complaint is that it is extremely fucking difficult when alone, and because I'm a lonely little cunt with no friends, I got my ass handed to me multiple times. But, when you have some people to help you out, it really does become the best part of the game. Shame this couldn't be a standalone title, really, because in order to play it, you have to be an owner of an otherwise shitty game.

Overall, Call of Duty: Ghosts is a terrible title with an idiotic plot, the worst ending in any video game, uninspired gameplay, and a mediocre multiplayer. If it didn't have the Extinction mode, I would give it a lower score than it gets. Be happy that aliens that destroyed the world saved you from a 5/100, Infinity Ward. Cucks.

Overall Score: 35/100

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